Tricking the Algorithm

Don't tell!

In late May, I got a notification from Instagram wishing me a happy birthday. My birthday wasn’t in May. And I wasn’t born in 1977. I am also not a man.

But don’t tell Meta that.

My goal for the last few years has been to trick the Instagram algorithm.

How, you ask? Oh, you didn’t ask? Ok, well, I’m going to tell you.

Be judicious with all likes. Am I prepared to be accosted by the matching posts that will immediately appear in my feed in retaliation for that Like? Oh, you like that? You want to see that? I will feed you only that. Liking used to be a tiny burst of support. Now it’s a liability.

Reels must be avoided at all costs. But what if my bestie shares a cute dog reel with me? Is it worth feeding the algorithm? Do I really want ten more videos of dogs hugging babies? Can I handle more “momstagram” humor? If I tap on this will it lead to SNAKES ON MY INSTAGRAM?!

Lay the trap with the settings. I purge my interests, “snooze” suggested posts, and actively mark all ads as irrelevant. Vigilance or it will figure you out!

How do I know if the hard work is paying off? And what does this have to do with babies?

Throughout my pregnancy I was advertised tampons. A year into baby life, and no sign of baby gear, baby toys, or baby anything shows up in my feed.

This is how I know it’s working.¹

1. That and the fact that ocassionally I get spammed by scantily-clad-female bot accounts that clearly only pay attention to the gender and birth date of my account.